[Five Minute Friday] Change

We can try as hard as we want – we can’t stop it. Change.
No matter how many plastic surgeries you’ll have, your body will eventually bear the features of age.
No matter how much money you spend on a house, you’ll die in it one day.
No matter how much you care for your children, they will leave home one day.
No matter how many friends you have or how often you meet for coffee, they will move away one day or you might move on.

Change is everywhere. Some of it we can delay, most of it is out of our control.

As a TCK change almost seems to be part of your genes.
There’s a voice inside of you saying, “you cannot go a year without change. Two years in one place is already too long. Just wait for it, your friends will move anyway. You can’t stay here.”

As I move into this new phase of my life , I find a certain reluctance to change inside of me.
I don’t want to change anymore.
The thing I loved about being a TCK – the moving – feels strange and exhausting to me out of a sudden. At least for the moment.
There is this yearning inside of me to just be.
To just stay where I am.
At least for now.

I guess we need both.
We need to change, it will happen if we want it or not.
To change is to live.
So rather embrace it than just be shaped by it.
Appreciate the way things we get to experience now.

In all of this we need a firm place to root ourselves.
A place that doesn’t change.
A person we can go back to when change breaks us apart.
The One who says about himself “I am the same – yesterday, today, and forever.”

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Linking up with Kate Motaung today over at Five Minute Friday!

[Five Minute Friday] Tell

It’s not really that hard. It’s very simple actually.
Open your mouth and speak.
Tell someone.
And yet, it often can be the hardeset thing in the world.

We speak a bazillion words every day, but how many of them are really worth telling? Do we tell the things that help those around us or will they vanish into thin air as soon as the words came out of our mouth?

We should tell things that last.
We should tell things that matter.
But this can be a real challenge sometimes.

Tell someone you’re sorry. Take the first step to reconcile a relationship.
Tell someone you love them.
Tell someone they’re beautiful on day when they really needed to hear it.
Tell someone they’re a blessing in your life and the best friends you could imagine.
Tell someone about the little things you enjoy about them because this can make a big difference to them.

Tell the truth.
As hard as it may be, as painful as it can be.
Raise your voice and tell those around you.
In the midst of oversharing nonsense on social media – share truth.
Tell about Christians suffering in Iraq and Syria.
Fellow human beings mistreated and killed for their beliefs.
Tell about people working in horrible conditions for our luxury.
Tell about girls trafficked right under our eyes.

Telling can be hard. It can cost us something.
But it can be powerful at the same time.
Our words can bring beauty into ashes, hope into despair, a breath of new life into dead bones.

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It’s Friday and I am linking up with Kate Motaung. One word. Five Minutes of Writing. Telling stories,  hearts, lives.

TCKs and the Mirror of Erised

When I was a teenager I read the Harry Potter series and I am currently listening to the audio books as a nice distraction from studying for my finals. 🙂

In the first book “Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone” the young boy Harry is given the news that he’s a wizard. 

His life changes within seconds: he is not just the forgotten orphan who never met his parents; he is now part of a new family at the Hogwarts school, with real friends and an adventurous lifestyle.

And then there’s this one scene in which Harry wanders the dark corridors of the castle one night and discovers the Mirror of Erised. 

Harry looks in the mirror and he’s suddenly surrounded by his mother and father – the people he never really met and misses the most. 
It’s such a sweet description of this eleven year old boy relishing a moment with his family and finally a sense of belonging. 
But when he shows his best friend Ron and he looks in the mirror he doesn’t see any of this. Instead, he sees himself as head of Griffindor house and Quidditch captain. He finally feels special since he normally has to fight for attention as one of five boys in a big family.

The Mirror of Erised is not an ordinary mirror. 

It doesn’t show you what is. 
It reveals your deepest desires, no matter how deep they might be hidden in your heart.
Yet, as soon as you take a step back the illusion is gone and you’re face to face with reality again.


Harry just can’t stop looking in that mirror. Night after night he goes back to see himself and relive the idea of a perfect family. But in the third night Dumbledore, the headmaster, finds Harry and tells him that “this mirror will give us neither knowledge or truth.” Eventually, Harry will have to take that step back into reality.


I feel like Harry sometimes. 

I am still surprised how much this relates to what many TCKs feel like. 
There’s this deep desire within us to belong. 
To be understood. 
To be ourselves without explanation or excuse. 
Sometimes the ache for people and places we had to leave behind is physically painful. 
All we want to do is to jump on a plane, fly to one of the places we call home, meet familiar faces, and feel that everything’s going to be fine. 
We can spend hours looking at pictures of what used to be. 
We harbor that warm feeling spending time in the past gives us. 
Skype calls with friends half across the globe better never end. 
Night after night we could go back and look into our Mirror of Erised.

But we can’t stay there forever. 

We, too, need a Dumbledore calling us back and guiding us through the reality of the present. We sometimes need this gentle reminder that our past façades don’t offer us anything. 
There’s no knowledge of truth in them. And unfortunately not much comfort either. 
They only increase the desire because whenever we put down our photographs, shut off our computer, or leave our houses we are still here. 
In the present, in reality.
What a disillusionment to let go. All enchantment’s gone within seconds.


But the reality we’re left with is not just bleak and empty. 

It is full of opportunities we’re supposed to seize. The gifts of the past we had the privilege to enjoy were not given to us in vain; they made us fit to take up the challenges of the present and turn them into an even better future. 
The things we endure and accomplish, the people we invest in today are the very memories we will dwell on tomorrow.

So let’s do it together. 

Let’s take a step back from the mirror. 
Let’s choose to face reality and the challenges it puts before us today. 
Let’s be grateful for our past, give into desires from time to time, and be even more excited for the future.

Als Teenager habe ich die Harry Potter Reihe gelesen und gerade höre ich die Hörbucher, das ist eine schöne Abwechslung nach einem langen Lerntag…:)

Im ersten Buch “Harry Potter und der Stein der Weisen” erhält der junge Harry die Nachricht, dass er ein Zauberer ist. Sein Leben ändert sich in Sekundenschnelle: er ist nicht mehr nur der vergessene Waisenjunge, der seine Eltern nie kennengelernt hat; er ist jetzt Teil einer neuen Familie in Hogwarts mit echten Freunden und einem abenteuerlichen Leben.
Und dann gibt es diese eine Szene, in der Harry eines Nachts die langen dunklen Korridore entlangläuft und den Spiegel von Erised entdeckt. Harry schaut in den Spiegel und ist plötzlich von seinen Eltern umgeben – den Leuten, die er nie kennengelernt hat und am meisten vermisst. Eine wirklich schöne Beschreibung, wie dieser elfjährige Junge einen Moment mit seiner Familie genießt, endlich fühlt er sich zuhause.
Aber wenn er den Spiegel seinem Freund Ron zeigt und der hineinsieht, sieht er nichts davon. Stattdessen sieht er sich selbst als Anführer von Griffindor und Quidditch Kapitän. Endlich fühlt er sich besonders, da er sonst immer um Aufmerksamkeit kämpfen muss als einer von fünf Jungs in einer Großfamilie.

Der Spiegel von Erised ist kein gewöhnlicher Spiegel. Er zeigt dir nicht, was ist. Er enthüllt deine tiefsten Sehnsüchte, egal wie tief sie in deinem Herzen vergraben sind. Aber sobald du einen Schritt zurückgehst, ist die Illusion weg und du stehst wieder der Realität gegenüber.

Harry kann aber nicht aufhören, in den Spiegel zu blicken. Nacht für Nacht kehrt er zurück, um sich selbst zu sehen und die Idee einer perfekten Familie wiederzuerleben. In der dritten Nacht kommt Dumbledore, der Schulleiter, vorbei und sagt Harry, dass “dieser Spiegel uns weder Wissen noch Wahrheit gibt.” Harry muss also irgendwann den Schritt zurück in die Realität machen. 

Ich fühle mich manchmal wie Harry. Und ich wunder mich immer noch, wie sehr das mit dem zu tun hat, wie es vielen TCKs oft geht. 

In uns ist diese Sehnsucht, dazu zu gehören.
Verstanden zu werden.
Wir selbst zu sein ohne Erklärung oder Ausrede.
Manchmal können wir den Schmerz förmlich spüren, da wir Leute so sehr vermissen, die wir zurücklassen mussten. Wir wollen einfach nur in ein Flugzeug steigen und an einen der Orte fliegen, die wir Zuhause nennen, bekannte Gesichter sehen und das Gefühl haben, dass alles gut werden wird.
Wir könnten Stunden damit verbringen, Bilder anzuschauen von Dingen, wie sie einmal waren. Wir bewahren dieses warme Gefühl in uns, das die Vergangenheit uns gibt. Und Skype Anrufe mit Freunden am andern Ende der Welt sollten am Besten nie aufhören. Nacht für Nacht kehren wir zurück und schauen in unseren Spiegel von Erised.

Aber wir können nicht für immer dort bleiben.

Wir brauchen auch einen Dumbledore, der uns zurückruft und in die Realität der Gegenwart führt. Wir brauchen manchmal diese sanfte Erinnerung, dass die Fassaden der Vergangenheit nichts für uns zu bieten haben, es ist kein Wissen oder Wahrheit in ihnen. Und leider auch nicht wirklich viel Trost. Sie verstärken eigentlich nur die Sehnsucht, denn wenn immer wir unsere Fotos weglegen, unseren Computer ausmachen oder unser Haus verlassen, sind wir immer noch hier.
In der Gegenwart, in der Realität. Es ist schwer, loszulassen. Aller Zauber ist innerhalb von Sekunden einfach verschwunden.

Aber die Gegenwart, die uns bleibt, ist nicht einfach nur leer. Sie ist voller Möglichkeiten, die wir ergreifen sollen. Die Geschenke der Vergangenheit, die wie erleben durften, wurden uns nicht umsonst gegeben; sie haben uns bereit gemacht, um die Herausforderungen der Gegenwart anzugehen und sie in eine bessere Zukunft zu verwandeln. 

Die Dinge, die wir aushalten und meistern, die Leute, in die wir heute investieren – das sind die Erinnerungen, die wir morgen in Ehren halten. 
Also lass es uns zusammen tun. Lass uns einen Schritt zurück treten, weg vom Spiegel. 
Lass uns bewusst die Realität sehen und die Herausforderungen, die sie uns heute stellt. Lass uns dankbar sein für unsere Vergangenheit, manchmal der Sehnsucht nachgeben, und noch gespannter auf die Zukunft sein. 

[Five Minute Friday] Fill

This is my prayer in the desert
When all that’s within me feels dry
This is my prayer in my hunger and need
My God is the God who provides

This is my prayer in the harvest
When favor and providence flow
I know I’m filled to be emptied again
The seed I’ve recieved I will sow (Desert Song. Brooke Ligertwood)


This song often speaks to me. It encompasses all the seasons of life, all the moods of my soul. It never stops at one place, but always seeks for more, looks out for the Lord. 


Life seems to be a process of being filled and being emptied again. 

Having times when people just pour into you. 
You feel as if God’s just opening the heavens to shower you with blessings. 
Your heart and mouth are flowing over with the joy you experience.

And then there are times when it’s your turn to give. 

When you pour into others, pass on from what you’ve been given before. 
Invest your time, money, thoughts, and emotions into someone else. 
There are situations and challenges that just drain your energy. 

The big challenge we have is to find a balance between these times. 

We cannot be happy all the time, not everything will go smoothly. 
But we’re neither supposed to struggle all the time. 
There will be joy in the morning after the sorrow of the night. 

On our own strength we won’t be able to maintain this balance. 

We have this privilege to go to the One whose strength and joy and encouragement are far greater than any we could ever come up with. 
He can fill us with more than we can ever imagine. 
And he loves doing it! 
He enjoys it when we come empty-handed and ask to be filled with his abundance. 
And he rejoices when we leave joyfully and fill someone else with this gift. 

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For the first time, Kate Motaung is hosting Five Minute Friday – Welcome! Everything else stays the same: one prompt. Five minutes of writing. No editing. Sharing. 

[Five Minute Friday] Begin

Yesterday was the day.
The day things came to an end.
I had my stateboard exam in English, a five hour exam and then it was done.
I studied five years for this. Now I am one step (and only one more exam) closer to graduation.
It was strange.

Yesterday, my roommate moved out.
We had shared an apartment for three years, enjoyed late night movie and laughter sessions,
lived a bit of life together.
When I got back home last night she was gone.
Her room was completely empty and I could hear my own voice echoing from the plain white walls.
It was strange.

While I feel sad about things coming to an end, I cannot deny a second emotion springing up in my heart: excitement.
Pure joy.
Apprehension of what comes next.

Graduation means stepping out into the world.
Getting a job. Moving on. Let’s see what life throws at me then.
An empty room means a new roommate. Breaking up of old habits, redecorating.
New people, new fun, new ideas.

In German we have a saying, “there’s magic in every new beginning” (Jedem Anfang wohnt ein Zauber inne).
And I am about to find out a little more if that’s true.

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One last time the fabulous Lisa-Jo Baker is hosting Five Minute Friday- thank you!

With quiet, soft steps…./Mit leisen Schritten…

Isn’t life ironic sometimes?
Just two days ago I posted about this feeling that’s been creeping up in me over the last few weeks. Things around me are coming to an end, passing by my eyes, and I can just look after them and whisper a quiet ‘Goodbye’.
And now, Lisa-Jo Baker talks about finishing well in the Five Minute Friday prompt – spot on. So I  post my thoughts again and hope you’ll join the conversation!
photo credit: Nathan Martin

With quiet, soft steps a part of my life says goodbye, and I am too busy to mourn it.
This week was full of ‘lasts’. 
The last paper, the last office hour with a professor, the last seminar.
A few weeks ago already was the last presentation, but I only realized it afterwards. 

It’s a lot of small steps, but they make a big difference, and I become aware of it only bit by bit. 
It’s the end of five years at uni. 
Five years of studying, of thinking and diving into complexities.
Five years of lights going on when I got something.
Five years of crazy study groups and wonderful people.

What I find most interesting or sad about it is not necessarily that it’s over, but that I don’t have time to say goodbye. Too many appointments, deadlines, and thoughts in my head keep me from saying Tschüss properly. 

But it is so important to not just go from one thing to the next. Don’t mourn nostalgically and never let go, but look back on everything you accomplished with pride. Enjoy and be grateful. 
Every step into something new is a bit easier if you finished the step before that well.  

I have written about this topic before, and I feel it will be part of my thoughts for a while. Things become a little easier with a RAFT
Life will always be full of ‘lasts’ and new beginnings. 
A life without movement is impossible – and honestly, who would want that? 
Without movement we are stuck, get rusty, die a little. 
But we can make transitions easier by making them consciously. 

You have to close doors behind you sometimes to know which open ones you can go through next.

How do you make transitions in your life? If you already graduated, how did you celebrate/experience/miss the end of your studies?


Mit leisen Schritten verabschiedet sich ein Lebensabschnitt und ich bin zu beschäftigt, ihm hinterher zu trauern.
Diese Woche war voll mit letzten Dingen. 

Die letzte Hausarbeit, die letzte Sprechstunde beim Dozenten, das letzte Seminar. 
Vor einigen Wochen schon war das letzte Referat, mir ist es aber erst danach aufgefallen.
Es sind viele kleine Schritte, aber sie machen doch einen großen Unterschied, der mir erst nach und nach bewusst wird. 
Es ist das Ende von fünf Jahren Uni. 
Fünf Jahre voller lernen und sich in Dinge reindenken.
Fünf Jahre Aha Erlebnisse haben. 
Fünf Jahre mit verrückten Lerngruppen und tollen Menschen.
Was ich an dem Ganzen interessant oder traurig finde ist nicht unbedingt, dass es zu Ende geht, sondern dass ich keine Zeit habe, Abschied zu nehmen. 
Viel zu viele Termine, deadlines und Gedanken im Kopf um bewusst ciao zu sagen.
Dabei ist es so wichtig, nicht einfach von einem zum nächsten zu gehen. 
Nicht wehmütig hinterher zu trauern und nicht loslassen, sondern mit Stolz auf das zurückblicken, was man geschafft hat. 
Sich freuen und dankbar sein. 
Jeder Schritt in etwas neues ist einfacher, wenn man den Schritt davor gut beendet hat.
Über dieses Thema habe ich schon öfter geschrieben und ich glaube, es wird mich noch ein bisschen länger beschäftigen. Mit einem RAFT geht so manches leichter. 

Das Leben wird immer wieder letzte Dinge und Neuanfänge haben. Ein Leben ohne Bewegung gibt es nicht – und ganz ehrlich, wer will das auch? Ohne Bewegung bleibt man stehn, rostet ein, stirbt. Aber man kann die Übergänge leichter machen, indem man sie bewusst macht. 

Man muss manchmal Türen hinter sich zumachen, um zu wissen, durch welche offenen man als nächstes gehen soll. 

Wie gestaltet du Übergänge in deinem Leben? Wie hast du das Ende deines Studiums erlebt/ gefeiert/verpasst?

[Five Minute Friday] Bloom

Sometimes I wonder.
If flowers thought as much as we do, what would they think about?
Would they think, Am I pretty enough? Is my dress good enough to show myself to the world?
O no, a petal is missing – this is horrible! Where can I hide?
I think I don’t have anything to give, I might just stay a bud forever.
And why in the world am I planted HERE? I’d much rather be somewhere else!

Even though I am not a nature person, it is good to let creation remind us of a few core human, worldy, and spiritual principles. We need those when we are caught in thoughts like those above.

Flowers don’t care how they look, they are just there.
No matter what color their ‘dress’ or if a petal is missing – they just bloom.
They let nature take its course.
A bud eventually turns into a full blooming flower, that’s how it is.

We are called to bloom, just like them.
With everyone we have, especially with our flaws.
Our destiny is not to remain buds forever.
Eventually, this life that’s been planted inside of us has to spring up and show itself to the world.

Flowers can’t decide where they’ll bloom.
But instead of complaining about location they simply make the most out of it.
One of the most amazing things for me is to take a walk and then discover a single flower in the most remote places. A flower in the middle of nowhere stands out.
It’s been planted there for a reason to bring joy to a wanderer’s heart.

We sometimes can’t decide where we are planted for a season in our lives.
But we can decide to make it the best of times by blooming and bringing beauty to unexpected places. You never know what wanderer will come by and be encouraged by the joy you bring.

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One prompt. Writing for five minutes flat. Linking up with wonderful writers. That’s Five Minute Friday with Lisa-Jo Baker!

[Five Minute Friday] Belong

It was nearly twelve years ago.
We had just come back to Germany, and even though it had only been two years – this time in Uganda had turned my world upside down. I had left as a child and came back as an adult.

Now I sat in a classroom with people I didn’t know, who spoke of things I didn’t know.
I paid with a currency I didn’t know as ‘German’.
I didn’t laugh at any jokes because I had no idea what ‘normal’ teenagers would laugh at.
I was incredibly tired of people asking me how Uganda had been (Have you seen elephants and snakes? Did you kill a lion? Do you speak ‘African’ now?), but as soon as I said no, they lost interest.

I felt utterly lost and in the wrong place.
All I wanted was to belong.
Isn’t that what we all want? I believe it’s a core longing in a human being.
To know who I was, what I could and couldn’t do.
To be me and others to be okay with it.

And it happened.
On a camp in the middle of nowhere, on a weekend with a lot of rain.
A group of people who had grown up in Russia, Brazil, Tanzania, or Egypt – all stranded in their ‘home culture’ Germany and having now clue about anything.
As soon as we started talking we clicked.
No matter where you have lived, no matter how long you’ve been gone, no matter how old you are – you are one of them.

We are all Third Culture Kids.
We feel lost in every single culture we have lived in, as if we don’t fit in any of them.
So we build our own space where we can find safety; a place we can call home.
Where we can be ourselves, as crazy, funny, or sad it might be.

This is a place to belong. And it is to this day.
Faces might have changed, people have grown up.
But as soon as I meet fellow TCKs face-to-face or via email/phone/skype, it is always the same feeling.
A feeling of belonging. Of family. Of home.

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An hommage to my beloved TCK family – but I am also linking up with Lisa-Jo Baker’s Five Minute Friday. One word. Write for five minutes. Don’t edit and share!

[Five Minute Friday] Exhale

I remember when I was in grade 12/13 in high school (in the US, that is a senior), I had a German teacher who started every lesson with a peculiar ritual: one minute of silence.
Sit on your chair, be quiet, and simply listen to your own breathing.
Inhale.
Exhale.
And again.

What seemed rather odd at first became my favorite part of the school day.
Looking forward to this one minute of pause, rest.
Doing nothing.
Just being.
Just listening to that breath that got me through the day.
That breath showing me that I was still alive.
Inhaling and exhaling was my way to show the world that I was still going, that I would continue to pick up the small and big fights it offered me.

I guess we need that moment of silence even when we’re out of school.
Life is just busy, throwing challenges at us, keeping on us a constant run.
We need that pause button, that short moment of rest.
Exhale and let go of things that bother us, that we can’t handle anymore.
Like that breath leaving our mouth feeling how that weight is lifted off our shoulders.
Take in new air, new perspectives, fresh voices.
Grasp inspiration and vision.
Inhale and show the world that we’re still alive.
That we keep going.
And that we’ll continue to pick up the small and big fights it offers us.

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It’s Friday and I am linking up with Lisa-Jo Baker. One prompt, five minutes of writing. No editing. Happy Friday!

[Five Minute Friday] Lost

You don’t have to enter a labyrinth to be confused.
You don’t have to drive with a rented car into a city you’ve never been to before to take the wrong turn.
You just have to get up in the morning to get lost.

Lost in the sea of emails flooding your inbox everyday.
Unnecessary info you forget as soon as you read it.
Invitations to events you can’t possibly fit into my already busy schedule.
People asking you to do something for them as if you weren’t super swamped already.

Lost in the masses of voices penetrating your mind everyday.
Did you do this already?
Are you aware of that deadline?
Have you heard this rumor?
What are your thoughts on that issue?

Sometimes I just want it all to stop.
Where is the PAUSE button for my life?
Sometimes I just want to be found.

It doesn’t take much to be found.
Like an email from a friend in the sea of junk, encouraging you.
Like a text from a friend asking how you’re doing and praying for you.
Like the quiet voice in your heart telling you: Listen to me. These emails and voices don’t matter in the long run.
It’s okay to be lost.
But know that I have found you long ago.
And I’ll continue finding you no matter how deep you’ll be lost in life.

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One prompt. Writing for five minutes flat. No editing. Sharing with fellow writers over at Lisa-Jo Baker’s Five Minute Friday!