mundane narratives

When I close my eyes…

… I can see it all.
The table, decorated with autumn leaves
and burning candles.

Plates filled to the brim with food
in different shapes and colors,
exuding a seductive smell.

People who’ve known each other for years,
gathering to share a meal,
to celebrate life.

I can hear our laughter because
someone has made a bad joke,
but that’s how we are
with each other.

I can hear the stories
we tell each other,
memories of days past and
dreams of the future.

Questions and thoughts
we don’t have to keep from each other
because that’s who we are –
friends who carry
each other’s thoughts,
who hold each other’s hearts.

But when I open my eyes it’s all gone.

There’s just me sitting
at an empty table
in an empty apartment.

There’s just
an empty heart
yearning to connect
with people,
longing for
a place
to belong
and grow.

And I realize that
it won’t ever change
unless I actively walk
towards my dreams.

Unless I take small steps
towards other people
and invest in a relationship
from scratch.

Unless I give something
of myself and
trust the other person
to treat it well.

Unless I show up
for someone else,
time and time
again.

Unless I step in front of
my own door and go
where people are.

Unless I set my table
and welcome people
to join me there.

Writing for Five Minute Friday today.
Photo courtesy of Hannah Busing @Unsplash

The “Good Life”

How do we measure a life?
What determines the label ‘good’, ‘successful’, ‘amazing’?

The titles in front of our names?
The numbers on our bank accounts?
The mountains we have climbed in our careers?
The accomplishments we can brag about?
The size of our homes, cars, fridges?
The value of stuff we can afford?
The photos of our many glamorous vacation spots?
The relationship status?

What about the many little moments of happiness that show us what is really important?
The seemingly mundane days when we simply show up for work and are present in what we do?
The many conversations that give our soul depth and new perspective?
The valleys that have taught us growth and endurance?
The cracks in our surface that allow the light to shine through?
What about the miraculous symphony of joy and pain that make life so incredibly rich?

Maybe life isn’t supposed to be good.
Maybe it was created to be abundant.

Writing for Five Minute Friday today.
Photo Credit: Unsplash

Watch out for the Balloons

There are certain things about ourselves that are rather difficult to control. Like our emotions or spontaneous reactions to something we see.
As I rode the subway halfway across town with twelve giant balloons in tow, I noticed people were looking at me differently. Heads turned and followed my every step. Looks lingered just a few seconds longer than normal. And then people broke into smiles, shy at first and then grinning from one ear to the other. Some nodded at me with approval, others voiced a soft “Oh”.
And I couldn’t help myself, I just had to chuckle and wonder about such a simple thing of joy.

Balloons make people happy.
And I believe there are a lot more metaphorical ‘balloons’ in our lives that we tend to overlook in our busyness or are too afraid to acknowledge.

Dreamy sunrises and sunsets on cold winter days.
The first signs of spring.
Someone singing along to music in their ears on their morning commute.
A stranger smiling at you.
A child talking to you as if you’d known them for years.
A pretty dress on someone else.
A word of encouragement from a friend.
People elevating your ideas to something magical.
The smell of your favorite food at the end of a long day.

It takes just a few little things to make us happy. Watch out for the ‘balloons’ in your mundane life – notice them, acknowledge them, speak them, celebrate them.

“If you see something beautiful in someone, speak it.”

Ruthie Lindsey

Writing for Five Minute Friday today.

It Begins at the Table

It’s Friday night and I’m in my kitchen carving what’s left of the turkey.
My thoughts wander back to last night when my apartment was filled to the brim, every last seat taken by friends and family to celebrate Friendsgiving.

The smell of cranberry sauce, roasted meat and pumpkin had exuded into the entire house. The food was rich and heavy; and we stuffed ourselves until we had to hold our bellies. We laughed at new jokes and smiled dreamily at old memories. We talked until the last bottle of wine (and there weren’t few) had been emptied.

And yet, my favorite moment was when we sat down at the table to share what we are thankful for. Such a simple and yet challenging practice.
A healthy body.
A job that fulfills you.
Protection in the chaos of busy schedules.
Fellowship with colleagues and friends.
Faithful, authentic relationships.
Healing and hope in the midst of pain.
The gift of new life.

The abundance we have been given has nothing in common with materialism. In a culture that wants to sell us fast and cheap deals, we need moments when we sit down and think about what really matters – People, unexpected grace and time are the things we truly value.
We find life, community and belonging when we sit down at the table.

In moments like last night I realize that faith was meant to be more like that.

A God who invites us to his table and all we can bring is ourselves.
A story that has nothing in common with what we do or where we come from.
A conversation about the darkness and joys of life.
A celebration of the beauty that embraces us all.
A place where we find true belonging, honest community, abundant life.

Writing for Five Minute Friday today.
If you have any good Thanksgiving leftovers recipes – hit me up!

In Search of Something Else

I’ve lived in my neighborhood for almost two years now.
I know my way around, I know the grocery stores and where to get good coffee.
I have found a few ‘favorites’ already.

But in the last few weeks I have pushed myself to explore a bit more where I live. Discover new places, new secrets, new treasures.
Just this morning, on my way home from the farmer’s market, I took a turn I hadn’t taken before and ended up in a beautiful little side alley with old houses and colourful summer flowers.

There’s always more and I want to live my life exploring and discovering everything this world has to offer.

When life pushes me around and clouds my vision, I want to search for beauty in the mundane.
When they say, ‘people will never change’, I want to look closer, listen in and challenge others to be the best they can be.
When a story seems to have ended, I want to see how the narrative continues.
When my view of God is limited by what people have told me, I want to explore new ways to seek and find him.
When they say, ‘refugees deserve to drown in the Mediterranean’, I want to raise my voice for those who are silenced.
When they say, ‘Let’s close our borders and shut out doors’, I want to open my hands and heart to those who come with nothing.
When I experience fear, mistrust and hatred all around me, I want to speak up louder, love more fiercely, live even braver.

There are many ways to live this life.
May our ways always be marked by love.

Writing for Five Minute Friday today.

Let’s keep it simple.

Welcome to the new year everyone! Did you have a good time with family, friends and food? I hope so.

My New Year’s Eve plans were cancelled at the last minute and I had to find an alternative quickly. Somehow this event comes with so many expectations: the perfect location, the perfect food, the perfect conversations – the last night of the year has to be the best party ever.
The more I thought about it, the more stressed out I felt about it all. Why do we make such a big fuss about things sometimes?
We work and prepare and keep ourselves busy.
We worry what other people will think about our homes, clothes, friendships, life plans and decisions.
We try so hard to follow all the rules to please God and be good Christians. We bury ourselves in arguments and theologies, just so we know it all and deal with it all.

This Christmas was full of people. A blogger friend from the US and my little brother from South Africa came to visit me and we spent lots of nights talking.
About the joys and pain of life.
About what it means to deconstruct your faith and rediscover old truths.
About the simplicity of it all when we watch out for it.
We laughed and we cried together and I realized: this is what life and faith are about. Relationships. Simple. Complex. Challenging. Beautiful. Life-giving.

So if I have to say anything about this new year ahead of us: Let’s keep it simple.
Let’s be okay to not be perfect all the time.
Let’s leave the mess for a while and focus on the people around us instead.
Let’s never grow tired of sharing our time, our hearts, our lives.
Let’s continue to look out for God in the midst of all of this, right here in the mundane.

I ended up celebrating New Year’s Eve with a family I didn’t know that well yet and their two kids. A very small group of people, Raclette, stories, and watching the fireworks over the city from the balcony.
And it was perfect.

Writing for Five Minute Friday today. One prompt, five minutes to write and an awesome community of writers and cheerleaders. Why don’t you join us this year?

If you’re German-speaking and looking for a way to discover God in your mundane narratives, now might be a good time to start reading my book “Fliege ins Leben, lande bei Gott”. I would love to see you on this journey!

How to Fill an Empty Soul

“Are you taking a break? I haven’t seen you on Facebook and instagram lately.”

That is correct.

A few weeks ago I couldn’t take it anymore. I just felt so unsatisfied when I looked at social media posts and how polished everyone’s lives where. They all looked so happy and perfect – while I was busy and alone and imperfect. I scrolled down feeds in search of some sort of meaningful news, but all I got was videos about cats and clickbait headlines.
The more time I spent on social media, the angrier I became and the emptier I felt.

It was time to get out. Continue reading “How to Fill an Empty Soul”

What a Table Can Do for Community

In my short twenty-eight years of life I’ve traveled the world quite a bit and spent
some time in different cultures. The best thing about other countries are the people
who invite you into their homes and lives to show you a few of their traditions.
Traditions I can then take back to my own life and introduce others to them. Continue reading “What a Table Can Do for Community”

A Second Look Changes Everything

It’s been five months since I started my teaching job at the new school.
Five months since I got to know 250 young people who I have the privilege of teaching. Through lessons, tests and talks in between I have gotten to know a tiny part of their personality and now have to make lucky guesses on their performance and chances. Often this seems nearly impossible.

Once in a while, my students surprise me.
I laugh or I cry.
I realize I don’t really know them at all.

Continue reading “A Second Look Changes Everything”

Rest in the Middle of Life

“Oh no, I couldn’t possibly. There’s just too much to do.
Work first, pleasure later.
I can rest when I’m done with everything.”

Do these statements sound familiar to you?
These battles inside of you between what your soul longs for and what your busy mind tells you to do? Continue reading “Rest in the Middle of Life”