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[Five Minute Friday] Time

Time.

What a word in a week of very little time. It was the first week after the holidays and I was overwhelmed with everything I had to do. No, time wasn’t really available.

Do you have time?

Yesterday I went to the library to print something and I ran into an old friend. We started some small talk and he had some questions. So we sat down.
“Do you have time for this?”, he asked.
I thought of my to do list, the stacks of papers to organize, the lessons to plan…
“Yes, let’s talk.”
Sometimes you have to make time.

Do you have time?

Time to pause for a moment in your rush to work to inhale the fresh morning air.
Time to recognize the first snowflakes making their way to the ground. Yes, winter has finally made it to Germany.
Time to enjoy the food you’re eating and start a conversation with a colleague about life and faith in a depth you never expected.
Time to take a deep breath and remind yourself that stress is not the end of the world. You can do more than you think.
Time to listen to a friend in need.

Time to hear the Father whispering, “Do you have time, my child, to discover all the little treasures I have hidden in the mundane for you to enjoy?”

Do you have time for the beautiful ordinary this week?

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Making time to write for Five Minute Friday today.

[Five Minute Friday] First

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

I hope you had some quiet weeks to spend time with your family, stuff yourself with good food and let the Christmas joy settle in your heart.
And to ring in the New Year in all corners around the world.

January. First month of the year.
Beginning of so many new things.
Quite a lot of people use the new year to come up with resolutions.
This is what I will do this year. Well, maybe until January 10 until work starts again and you just need these guilty pleasures or weaknesses to keep you going.
I’m not a big fan of these resolutions because they put so much pressure on me and the disappointment coming along with them is not really helping.
So here are some things I will NOT do in the next year.

I will not be able to keep up with all the friends around the globe, as much as I want to. I will, though, be more intentional in my investing and sharing.

I will not work 24-7 and carry the world’s weight on my shoulders. More than that, I will practice keeping Sabbath and organizing my week and heart towards it, not away from it.

I will not do quiet time every day and feel bad about it. God can be found outside my room at 5 a.m. and I want to challenge myself to find Him in unexpected places.

I will not sit around and wait for the perfect plan to move forward, the perfect guy to show up, the perfect job to secure my future. Waiting time is never wasted time and I want to make the most of the days right in front of me.

I will not keep up the facade of a happy clappy, perfectly-in-order life every single day. That would be a lie. I am a human being that struggles like everyone else, that falls and has to deal with her mess. I will, however, practice more vulnerability.

This year I will learn to not DO.
I will BE.

What are some of the things you want to learn this year? I would love to hear from you!

Writing for Five Minute Friday today. One prompt, five minutes on the timer and Go! No editing, but lots of sharing and connecting! Come and join us?

[Five Minute Friday] Season

Yesterday I went for a walk with a friend. The sun was already down and we were enclosed in darkness. People brushed by us with their faces tucked away in thick winter coats. We wore hats, coats and gloves, but it was still cold.

As we walked the busy streets of our town I realized how much I detest the cold.
I don’t like my whole body shuddering in these low temperatures.
I don’t like tense muscles because I’m shivering so much.
I don’t like wet feet because the beautiful white snow has become some brown disgusting slump.
I don’t like people running past each other, everyone in a hurry to get out of the cold. We’re generally in a bad mood because, well, it’s just too cold.
I don’t like that it’s Advent, but I am way too busy to even slow down, reflect and let Christmas joy settle in my worry-haunted heart.

Since I spent a few years in warmer realms I am naturally inclined towards the sun.
Wouldn’t it be nice to have summer all year round, I would suggest in my dreams.
Recently I’ve come to answer this question with no.

Despite the cold and the moody people, winter has its beauty.
There are lights and the smell of freshly cut branches in the house.
There’s baking Christmas cookies and gathering for tea times with friends.
There are slower songs that bring back memories from all those winters when we were small.

There’s a moment of slowing down, letting go, death.
Creating space for unseen things to grow and unfold.
Practicing patience while waiting for spring to bring back new life and new dreams.

Winter is a moment for the soul to pause and cleanse itself. When the first rays of sun and blossoms break through in spring it is ready to rejoice and take in new life.

Just as nature blossoms and dies we need these seasons to learn, to wait, to grow.

Writing for Five Minute Friday today.

[Five Minute Friday] Table

It’s quite unusual for a TCK to think about settling down and owning a home, but sometimes these thoughts pop into my head.
Dreams of a house, a big old house with plenty of rooms to have guests over who don’t have to sleep on the floor.
A large kitchen to cook and experiment.

And a table.

A large table to seat many people.

The people who come to my parents’ house probably remember one thing: being stuck at the table. In a good way.
We have lunch or dinner together and we start talking. And somehow we share and engage and discuss so much that we don’t realize how fast time flies.
Many good memories and thoughts were created at that table.

I want people who come to my house to remember similar things.
For now it’s no big house or large kitchen, but rather a small student apartment (it’s old, though) and a small table with shaky legs.

Nevertheless, I want to make memories.

My table should be a place for good conversations to take place.

A place where people are brave enough to open up and don’t have to keep up a painful façade.
A place where we connect over the simple activity of cooking and eating and experience the Lord’s presence right in the middle of it.

A place where we worship and pray with our songs and stories and realize that the church is right where people gather to break bread and enjoy fellowship with the Lord and each other.

Fellowship is so precious and essential for our spiritual well-being.
We often try to foster it through bigger words or louder songs.
But often it can be as simple as sharing a meal with someone and hearing their story.
You’d be surprised how much you’ll see the Lord in that other person if you decide to listen and break bread with them.

Who can you invite to your table this week?

Writing for Five Minute Friday today.

[Five Minute Friday] Dwell

dwell (dwɛl).

Verb.
1. To live somewhere
2. To look at something for a long time

It’s always refreshing to spend time with P, my godson.
He’s not even a year old and can’t say a word. And yet we ‘talk’. It’s a joy to spend time with him and watch him move.
The way he touches objects for the first time.
The way he moves around and slowly expands the little radius he calls his world.
The way he looks at things. Really looks at things.

The other day I wore earrings and he spent about thirty minutes just looking at it again and again. Running his small fingers across the surface, turning it back and forth to take in every detail.
He’s got all the time in the world.
No meeting to attend, no emails to reply to, no friend meeting somewhere.
No inner voice telling him to move on.
He can just dwell.

I don’t know when it happens that life takes on this incredible speed we all seem to run at.
During breakfast we already plan the day ahead of us.
At night we reflect on all the challenges we had to face during the day.
Goodness, I even detected myself drifting off in conversations. While my friend was talking I was already planning next day’s lessons. My incoherent answers to her questions made me realize how off I really was.
We always need to move forward.
Towards the next weekend, the next vacation, the next promotion, the next partner.
We’re not allowed to dwell.
To stay in one place for a longer time.
To look at things and people – really look at them.
Run our hands across the surface and take in all the details.
Invest the time to dig deeper until we reach some deeper level of intimacy.
Enjoy and rest in this moment until that inner voice is silenced by a deep, deep peace.

Writing for Five Minute Friday today.

[Five Minute Friday] Weary

I had it coming for a while now.
Too many weeks of running around, stressing out about all the things I had to do.
Too many days of not enough sleep, quick lunches or no food at all.
Too many hours of sitting at the computer, planning and worrying.
Too often the feeling of being overwhelmed, wondering how I could manage it all.
It started with a soft itching in my throat. Then a running nose. Then a feeling of heaviness in my legs. Now I am writing this from my bed, lying down with the flu.

I am weary. And sick.

I guess we all know this feeling of everything being simply too much.
We work too many hours because something just has to be done.
We don’t take time to relax, to really enjoy a meal.
We take chances and keep on working even though our bed’s calling for us. Sure we can survive on little sleep, but we shouldn’t have to.
We push everyone away because we’re so buried in work and worry.
We are weary, but we won’t admit it.

A few weeks ago I complained to my roommate how everything was just too much and I didn’t know where to start anymore.
She said, “You do know you’re allowed to say NO?”
My head knows, but my heart needs to know it, too.
My hands needs to release the task I hold on to so firmly and relax.
My mind needs to let go of the thought it keeps mulling over and shut down for a while. My spirit needs to stop worrying and come to rest.
My lips need to muster up the courage and say the redemptive words:
Stop.
No.
I am weary.
I need help.

If you’re weary this week, pause for a moment.
Allow yourself to rest a bit.
Your self does not depend on what you do.
Reach out for rest.
Reach out for help.

Writing for Five Minute Friday today.

[Five Minute Friday] Dance

A few years ago I finally took my first ballroom dance lessons.
My roommate had nagged me about it for years, “You have to go, it’ll make you happy.” But I always found some excuse. Sure, I wanted to learn to dance, but I just never found the time or inspiration.

I came home after the first lesson and something was different.
My feet hurt and my hips weren’t used to the steps yet, but I was elated.
My spirits soared and I couldn’t stop smiling.
I felt like being high.
This feeling hasn’t changed ever since, dancing is such a wonderful experience.
It releases a joy and freedom inside of you that you never knew you had in you.

Unfortunately, I don’t have a dance partner at the moment and way too little time to dance often. But I often dream about it.
I wish there was more dance in my life.
Not just the steps and movements, but the elatedness that comes from it.
The easiness with which your feet touch the ground and move around.
It makes you feel light, as if you could anything.
The high spirits and deep joy that make something inside of you come alive.
Some hidden freedom that needed to be released.
The freedom to just be, to just do – because you feel like it.
The freedom to not care about how you look or what others would say about you.
The courage you get to try out new steps and create new beauty.
The little twitchings in your feet that make you want to dance everywhere.

I wish there was more dance in all our lives.
More of that freedom to be and do.
More of that releasing power.
More of that joy and hope.
More of that life.

Writing for Five Minute Friday today.

[#write31days] Day 30 Bacon

Welcome to Day 30 of #write31days!
For more information check out the series’ page.
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Well, it’s the last Friday in October and once more we gather at Kate Motaung‘s place to write on a prompt. For this month all the prompts were voted by the bloggers themselves. If you’ve never read anyone else’s writing in this challenge, you’ve missed out on funny, inspiring, and encouraging people!
So it is no surprise that for this challenge they would vote the prompt BACON.

In the light of the latest findings that meat consumption causes cancer I don’t really feel comfortable writing about my ‘affinity’ for bacon.
I don’t eat it often, but sometimes I have this craving.

Smelling freshly cooked bacon takes me right back to sweet memories.
Like the many birthdays when we would cook bacon as a treat. My mom would put the bacon in the pan, turn up the heat. And leave. A few minutes later you would find all of us at the breakfast table eating crumpled, slightly burned pieces of meat and Mom going, “I don’t really know what happened here, guys.”
Like that one time when I spent a weekend with friends in Raleigh, NC and they wanted to introduce the German to the art of bacon cooking. It took a while, but now I know and actually enjoy cooking it. Whenever I smell bacon in my kitchen I immediately remember this fun weekend.
Like that one time about two years later with the same people in the same place. We hadn’t seen each other in two years, but cooking bacon together, stuffing our sandwiches, and pouring some coffee felt as if we hadn’t been apart at all.

I have always been fascinated how memory works.
It often doesn’t take much to trigger a film in our mind.
Smells, objects, sounds are the conduit to our memory and I am glad that they interrupt me in my busyness once in a while.
Then I sit back, let the images flash by before my inner eye, and smile.

What are some of the smells or sounds that trigger your memory?

[#write31days] Day 23 Joy

Welcome to Day 23 of #write31days!
For more information check out the series’ page.
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It’s also Friday today, so I am linking up with my friends at Five Minute Friday.

It’s fall. Leaves are turning brown, yellow, and red. The sun shines less often, the sky is often dark and cloudy. Slowly by slowly, it’s getting colder.
People replace their shimmering thin summer clothes with gray or brownish thick coats. They pull out gloves and hats to cover themselves.
Heads vanish under giant hats and caps, faces are bowed low.
Smiles disappear from faces, who would have anything to be happy about in this weather?

It seems like joy is sucked out and in comes grumpiness, haste, worry about what will be tomorrow.

This is what I see around me, this is how I often feel. As soon as it is October I become moodier. Some call it “Winter blues”, others just call it ‘life’.

There will always be times when joy disappears, life just sucks it out of us and we’re left with empty, desperate, needy souls.

Joy doesn’t come easy, but is often found in unexpected places. If we train our hearts and eyes to look for it, we’ll find more joy than we think.

A group of students who enjoyed a lesson and laughed with me.
A text from a friend saying ‘Just thinking about you’.
A care package with delicious foods to get you through a busy week.
A ray of sunlight on a really cloudy day.

A reminder that He is still sovereign and His joy does not depend on mere happenings.

[#write31days] Day 16 Green

Welcome to Day 16 of #write31days!
For more information check out the series’ page.
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It’s also Friday today, so I am linking up with my friends at Five Minute Friday.

These last two weeks have been extremely busy for me. Getting up way too early in the morning, running around all day, falling into bed at night, totally exhausted. My work is not physically heavy, yet it takes a lot of energy. Assignments to hand in, lessons to plan, talks with students, meetings with colleagues…there’s not much time left and a casual date with a friend suddenly becomes a big deal.

Isn’t life crazy sometimes?
These weeks when we feel it has ropes tied around us and pulls from all sides at the same time?
We can’t help but feel torn.
And incredibly overwhelmed.
In doubt that we can do it all, that we will ever manage, that we are good enough.

When we are trapped in this ‘prison of busyness’ we need to get out.
No, I don’t mean leave everything behind. Often we can’t change all at once.
But little breaks here and there.
An hour where work is not allowed to bother us.
A nap in the middle of the day to refresh us.
A book that will direct our thoughts to another world.

A walk in the woods, leaving the confinements of our own four walls and experiencing the vast beauty of nature. Breaking out of our small headspace to discover there’s so much more. Exchanging the dull gray colors of our daily lives for a whole array of green, yellow, and orange. Woods in the fall are magnificent!
Whenever I take a walk there, things suddenly fall into place.
I look at the trees and they seem to be telling me, “Don’t worry about today or tomorrow. We have been here long before yesterday, we’ve seen it all. And yet we are still here. And so will you.”
Taking a break doesn’t have to be much.
Just do something to expand your view and redirect your focus to the really important things from time to time.