[Five Minute Friday] Table

It’s quite unusual for a TCK to think about settling down and owning a home, but sometimes these thoughts pop into my head.
Dreams of a house, a big old house with plenty of rooms to have guests over who don’t have to sleep on the floor.
A large kitchen to cook and experiment.

And a table.

A large table to seat many people.

The people who come to my parents’ house probably remember one thing: being stuck at the table. In a good way.
We have lunch or dinner together and we start talking. And somehow we share and engage and discuss so much that we don’t realize how fast time flies.
Many good memories and thoughts were created at that table.

I want people who come to my house to remember similar things.
For now it’s no big house or large kitchen, but rather a small student apartment (it’s old, though) and a small table with shaky legs.

Nevertheless, I want to make memories.

My table should be a place for good conversations to take place.

A place where people are brave enough to open up and don’t have to keep up a painful façade.
A place where we connect over the simple activity of cooking and eating and experience the Lord’s presence right in the middle of it.

A place where we worship and pray with our songs and stories and realize that the church is right where people gather to break bread and enjoy fellowship with the Lord and each other.
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Fellowship is so precious and essential for our spiritual well-being.
We often try to foster it through bigger words or louder songs.
But often it can be as simple as sharing a meal with someone and hearing their story.
You’d be surprised how much you’ll see the Lord in that other person if you decide to listen and break bread with them.

Who can you invite to your table this week?

 Writing for Five Minute Friday today.

[Five Minute Friday] Dwell

dwell (dwɛl).

Verb.
1. To live somewhere
2. To look at something for a long time

It’s always refreshing to spend time with P, my godson.
He’s not even a year old and can’t say a word. And yet we ‘talk’. It’s a joy to spend time with him and watch him move.
The way he touches objects for the first time.
The way he moves around and slowly expands the little radius he calls his world.
The way he looks at things. Really looks at things.

The other day I wore earrings and he spent about thirty minutes just looking at it again and again. Running his small fingers across the surface, turning it back and forth to take in every detail.
He’s got all the time in the world.
No meeting to attend, no emails to reply to, no friend meeting somewhere.
No inner voice telling him to move on.
He can just dwell.

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I don’t know when it happens that life takes on this incredible speed we all seem to run at.
During breakfast we already plan the day ahead of us.
At night we reflect on all the challenges we had to face during the day.
Goodness, I even detected myself drifting off in conversations. While my friend was talking I was already planning next day’s lessons. My incoherent answers to her questions made me realize how off I really was.
We always need to move forward.
Towards the next weekend, the next vacation, the next promotion, the next partner.
We’re not allowed to dwell.
To stay in one place for a longer time.
To look at things and people – really look at them.
Run our hands across the surface and take in all the details.
Invest the time to dig deeper until we reach some deeper level of intimacy.
Enjoy and rest in this moment until that inner voice is silenced by a deep, deep peace.

Writing for Five Minute Friday today.

[Five Minute Friday] Weary

I had it coming for a while now.
Too many weeks of running around, stressing out about all the things I had to do.
Too many days of not enough sleep, quick lunches or no food at all.
Too many hours of sitting at the computer, planning and worrying.
Too often the feeling of being overwhelmed, wondering how I could manage it all.
It started with a soft itching in my throat. Then a running nose. Then a feeling of heaviness in my legs. Now I am writing this from my bed, lying down with the flu.

I am weary. And sick.

I guess we all know this feeling of everything being simply too much. 
We work too many hours because something just has to be done.
We don’t take time to relax, to really enjoy a meal.
We take chances and keep on working even though our bed’s calling for us. Sure we can survive on little sleep, but we shouldn’t have to.
We push everyone away because we’re so buried in work and worry.
We are weary, but we won’t admit it.

A few weeks ago I complained to my roommate how everything was just too much and I didn’t know where to start anymore.
She said, “You do know you’re allowed to say NO?”
My head knows, but my heart needs to know it, too.
My hands needs to release the task I hold on to so firmly and relax.
My mind needs to let go of the thought it keeps mulling over and shut down for a while. My spirit needs to stop worrying and come to rest.
My lips need to muster up the courage and say the redemptive words:
Stop.
No.
I am weary.
I need help.

If you’re weary this week, pause for a moment.
Allow yourself to rest a bit.
Your self does not depend on what you do.
Reach out for rest.
Reach out for help.

Writing for Five Minute Friday today.

A Piece of Home

I just spent a few days with my grandmother.
She lives in a small village, and when I say small I really mean small. About one hundred people live there, only ten of them are below fifty years old.
We used to live there for a year, a very challenging year I have to say. After two years in the African jungle we ended up in this small village with not much to do. The bus runs twice a day – to school in the morning and back in the afternoon. People go to church on Sundays and to the pub on weeknights, that’s it.
I have to be honest, I was quite happy when we moved to a bigger town after a year.

Once in a while, though, I return to visit my grandma and most of the time it’s rather dull. Still the same nothingness. You have to plan your trip carefully if you come by train because the bus doesn’t run very often.
It sometimes feels like traveling into the middle of nowhere.

Entering my grandma’s house is like stepping out of your normal busy life into a quiet zone. It’s like life’s busyness stops all at once, it can’t get through that old wooden door.
I had never been able to define what awaits you inside until now.
There’s a calmness and peace which seems boring on the surface; yet, only when you enter you realize how desperately your soul needs exactly that.

A kitchen with an old oven. The smell of freshly cut wood. A warmth that creates a homely atmosphere immediately.
A table in a sunlit corner of the room, surrounded by an old wooden bench and chairs. Lots of chairs to accommodate the many visitors coming by.
The constant smell of coffee and some cake, which Gran can pull out of the most unexpected corners.

An old wooden staircase whose boards creek unless you know where to step. It leads you to two rooms, both older than everyone in the family. It’s hard to find electric sockets, they just didn’t exist when these rooms were built.
The floor made of old beams shimmering so brightly from decades of cleaning, waxing and trodding on them.
A huge bed made of dark wood with thick down feathers and a large cupboard attached to it. Give me one person who wouldn’t want to jump from the cupboard right into the soft covers. It’s just too tempting and we’ve been scolded way too many times for giving in.

Another small steep staircase takes you to the attic, the best part of the entire house. For years and years it has been the storeroom for whoever doesn’t have any space in their own house.
The perfect treasure hideout for kids.IMAG1294 Old cupboards, chairs, clothes, lamps. Each of them once belonged to uncles and aunts, great cousins and grandfathers. Each of them has a story to tell. Even though I’m all grown up now I still enjoy going up there, taking a trip down memory lane. Looking at the different pieces of furniture or clothing and imagining the story behind them. These dust-covered objects are way more than objects – they are a conduit into sweet memories of the past.

And then there’s grandma, of course.
A small roundish lady with a bun and a colorful apron. Her long black hair is spotted with gray and white streaks; her hands and face are lined with wrinkles.
She looks beautiful.
Beautifully, gracefully old. Immensely alive.
Her eyes are still full of fire and energy, and when she laughs you can see the joy in them.

She used to be a wild girl.
As the second youngest of four children she explored life and rebelled against boundaries to discover more about the world. She married a boy from the next village, she says it was love at first sight. She worked hard, running a farm, cooking for fifteen people every day, and raising seven children. She became a widow far too early at age fifty-four.
Her hands testify to the many hours of work and worry she has gone through.

She has been the good soul of the house ever since.

Despite a lot of hardships she persevered. “I simply had no other choice”, is what she often says when you ask her how she managed all the challenges life threw at her.
“And we survived.”

DSCI0425The kitchen is where most of her life takes place.
You can find her there early in the morning when she has her first cup of coffee before she heads out to feed her cats and chicken.
You always know when she’s busy because you can hear her soft humming – always the same three notes – in the whole house.
You will always find her working in the house or in her beautiful garden, except for an hour in the afternoon when she takes a nap in the giant armchair in the living room.

Life here is quiet. Life here is slow.

There’s a crazy loud world out there – but here there’s peace and quiet.
There are busy agendas and schedules out there – but here there’s only the right now. The work in front of you.
Like cracking walnuts for two hours and peeling the best parts out of the hard shell.
Like baking cake and learning the secrets from the best.
Like sitting down over a delicious meal and sharing what life has been like since we last saw each other.
Like listening to stories of the past and marveling at God’s grace and protection.

Life is good because I finally slow down enough to discover its little blessings in the mundane.

Grandma’s house is always open. There is a bell, but no one ever rings it. You just turn the key and enter.
This house has already seen people from all kinds of countries, continents, and lifestyles. Visitors from overseas and next door. Gran doesn’t speak any English and we have had quite a few interesting ‘lost in translation’ encounters.
Gran has never traveled much except Norway and Israel, but through the many visitors she has seen the world.

Grandma’s house is quite special.
It’s a place where you’ll always find a spare bed to rest your heavy legs.
A place where there’s always food on the table. “And if there’s not we’ll make some”, as my uncle says.
A place where someone will wait with open arms and an open ear to listen.
A place where you’ll meet a messy bunch of people I call my family.

A place you’ll never leave empty-handed, I promise.
You’ll literally have your bags packed with goods Grandma has for you. Instead of money she gives you eggs from her chicken, homemade ham and bread, even entire meals.
“It’s nothing”, she says.

But it is something.

You take a lot more away than a bag of goods. Wherever you go from here, you’ll carry stories with you.
Stories of the past that shape the present and inspire the future.
The big picture that binds us all together.
You treasure the memories for times to come.
Memories of quiet afternoons and walks around the lake in the sun.
The taste of home-cooked meals and sweet fellowship around the table.
The experience that despite all differences and distances family bonds are there to connect us all.

Grandma’s house, tucked away in this small village in the middle of nowhere, is a lot more than an old farmhouse.

It’s a piece of home.

And it will stay home as long as we decide to return and make it home.

[Five Minute Friday] Dance

A few years ago I finally took my first ballroom dance lessons.
My roommate had nagged me about it for years, “You have to go, it’ll make you happy.” But I always found some excuse. Sure, I wanted to learn to dance, but I just never found the time or inspiration.

I came home after the first lesson and something was different.
My feet hurt and my hips weren’t used to the steps yet, but I was elated.
My spirits soared and I couldn’t stop smiling.
I felt like being high.
This feeling hasn’t changed ever since, dancing is such a wonderful experience.
It releases a joy and freedom inside of you that you never knew you had in you. 

Unfortunately, I don’t have a dance partner at the moment and way too little time to dance often. But I often dream about it.
I wish there was more dance in my life.
Not just the steps and movements, but the elatedness that comes from it.
The easiness with which your feet touch the ground and move around.
It makes you feel light, as if you could anything.
The high spirits and deep joy that make something inside of you come alive.
Some hidden freedom that needed to be released.
The freedom to just be, to just do – because you feel like it.
The freedom to not care about how you look or what others would say about you.
The courage you get to try out new steps and create new beauty.
The little twitchings in your feet that make you want to dance everywhere.

I wish there was more dance in all our lives.
More of that freedom to be and do.
More of that releasing power.
More of that joy and hope.
More of that life.

Writing for Five Minute Friday today.